How to become softer?
Remember, as the hero of a famous film said: “Now people need to be softer ...” But how to become softer and calmer, if all efforts are broken about our temperament, and flashes of aggression now and then destroy our attempts to change the character? Read about it below.
How to become calm
In fact, the whole focus lies in our attitude to life. If there is a deep understanding that everything that people do, they do, proceeding from their own character, and cannot do otherwise, this will already make us much calmer and more tolerant towards them. And, as a result, the very gentleness to which we aspire will appear in the character. How to do this in practice?
There is nothing complicated about it. Every time you notice an outburst of anger or aggression, try to analyze its cause. Why did you react to someone's actions or words? You can believe me, in the overwhelming majority of cases, people did not even think to take you out of themselves, that is, they acted so unintentionally, without a desire to harm you.Gradual awareness of this simple fact will eventually lead you to a deep understanding that people do not always have power over their character and often act unconsciously, which means that they are not angry at all.
A small but important note
Of course, it is difficult to struggle with character, but I will tell you one secret: the most impressive results are achieved not by those who fight, but by those who are aware. If you deliberately forbid yourself something, it will only lead to distortions in another area. Try to forbid yourself to eat tasty: in the end, you'll be more worried, the amount of stress will increase. Also here: in order to have less outbursts of aggression, it is not necessary to suppress them by force of will. It is necessary after it happened, sit quietly and think about why it happened. Any qualitative change can occur only in a non-violent way. On mature reflection, people often come to conclusions about the ridiculousness of some manifestations of their character, and this is what changes them.
Of course, this is not a panacea for everyone, there are other ways to achieve peace of mind. Some are described in our article for the fair sex. How to become calm.In many ways, achieving confidence helps self-confidence, and this quality is characteristic of attractive persons.